A few weeks ago I sat by candlelight and allowed the voices of ancestors to move through me. Interestingly, a WWI voice appeared. Who shows up when you sit in silence? What do you learn?

I look out over the foggy muddy battlefield to see the hazy figures of men I used to know. Used to laugh with, smoke with, and play cards with. They are no longer here on this earthly plane. They exist only in memories.

The battle today was rough. Noises exploding all around as we struggled to stay alive and not go crazy.

It's easy for a man to lose his mind here in the trenches or walking in No Man's Land. The screaming of men and artillery fill the air. The howling of death. Moans for mothers or wives can be heard all around me day and night.

Sometimes I crouch low along the trench in the dark and hide. Close my eyes and ears to the noise - that deafening noise. I rock gently back and forth trying to keep the voices in my head contained, lest they be released and I'm deemed mad. Perhaps I am mad. How can a man be sane when death, disease, and gaping wounds surround him for months on end?

How can any one of us go home in tact? Can we hide our pain? The torment we feel? The fear? Will we ever feel unafraid?

I fear the gas that slithers across the open fields. Depending on which way the wind blows, you may be hit. It's worse at night when we can't see it coming.

I don't want to die but death surrounds us. Lives with us even in the trench. There is nowhere to bury them yet. Many stare back at us with unseeing eyes with a look that they know we will soon join them.

The rats scurry along the planks in the trench. Little bastards eating what little food we have and nibbling on our dead> I hate them. I fear to sleep in case they take a bite out of me.

Even the silence frightens me. When we go behind the lines to rest, my body is still on alert. My ind can't shut down. In the trenches I know and hear the dangers. Familiar sounds. Away from the front the danger lurks in the darkness. It makes me shake an feel cold seeping into my bones even though the night is warm.

How will I survive this?

As you read that channeled passage, what do you notice? Fear? How much of that fear was brought home and hidden? What is kept hidden or secret threatens to destroy everyone and will be passed down through the generations. People in fear are easier to control - and it's that one point of war - to keep humanity under control?

We must be silent no more about the war trauma that affects our families and ourselves. It is time to look beyond the basic records and family stories (and lies) and find the deeper truths.

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